“Being paid doesn’t make you a professional; how you handle your business, conditioning, preparation and who you are as a person is what makes you a professional,” the late Jim Bernhardt told players with the Chesapeake Bayhawks.
Dave Cottle, head coach of the Major League Lacrosse franchise at the time, recalls Bernhardt delivering the message shortly after he hired him. The former University of Maryland head coach brought the former Houston Texans and Penn State football coach onto his staff at the time for those exact pieces of wisdom.
According to Cottle, that quote also exemplifies how Jim’s three sons, Jake, Jesse and Jared, now carry themselves as players in the Premier Lacrosse League.
“Those guys all have great character,” said current Maryland coach John Tillman. “They’re reliable. They’re going to do the right things. There’s just a level of self-discipline that those guys have.”
Maryland Whipsnakes head coach Jim Stagnitta reiterated similar sentiments when discussing Jake.
“He has the discipline and drive to be successful and great character,” Stagnitta echoed. “He’s a competitor and once you think he’s done or that he’s not going to be able to come back and compete, he always bounces back. He’s one of the few players that I’ve ever been around that you can’t count out. You can never count the Bernhardts out.”
Denver Outlaws head coach Tim Soudan shared those sentiments about the brothers, saying “It starts with their father. Having a coaching father and learning the lessons that they learned growing up, I think they really know how to prepare. Their focus on the task at hand is always really high. They’re highly competitive, highly focused and they’re they’re tough.”
The Bernhardts are one of a handful of siblings in the PLL. Yet, when the Outlaws face the Whipsnakes in Chicago this weekend, all three brothers will share the field for the first time as professionals — and just the second time ever in a competitive game. This reunion was made possible by Jared’s return to lacrosse earlier this summer. The youngest of the trio made his PLL debut in June after spending the past four years pursuing a football career that included a stint in the NFL with the Atlanta Falcons.
“It’s exciting… He obviously accomplished something that a lot of people have never done or will never do, which is amazing in itself,” Jake said about Jared’s professional accomplishments.
“I think it’s good for the sport to have him back and I think it’s good for him, too. The football thing is awesome, but at the same time, I think he also missed lacrosse and the atmosphere in the locker room that’s associated with the sport.”
Jared’s return to lacrosse also has allowed him to share a locker room with Jesse for the first time both as players.
“It’s nice to get to see him a couple of days of the week throughout the summer,” Jesse said. “I think walking into a locker room where there’s familiarity has helped. Besides myself, he played with most of the Maryland guys on the team. So there’s definitely some comfort in that.”
Jared had the opportunity to sign with any of the eight PLL teams, including the Whipsnakes, Jake’s team and the Outlaws’ Week 7 opponent. When asked how much both older brothers tried to sway Jared’s decision, Jesse downplayed their influence.
“I probably tried to stay away from it more than I think people probably would think,” Jesse explained. “We were trying to just advise and guide him through the process, knowing that, in the end, he just needed to do what was going to be best for him.
“Fortunately, it worked out for us,” Jesse added. “I’m not complaining and am obviously glad he decided to join the Outlaws.”
Maryland and Denver’s matchup on July 12 is the second instance of the “Bernhardt Bowl” and comes nearly eight years after the first time the brothers played in the same game. In 2017, Jake and Jesse were teammates on Team USA and scrimmaged their alma mater, Maryland, fresh off the Terrapins’ first national championship in 42 years. Jared, a sophomore at the time, was on the opposing side of his older brothers and managed to score three goals despite being on the losing end of a one-goal game.
Yet, there were no real losers that day as far as the Bernhardts were concerned.
“I vividly remember the picture that we took after that game. It was super special for us all to be able to compete,” Jared said. “We put a lot of work into getting to where we are, and it’s a pretty cool feeling to be able to look back on some of those memories now, especially that one.”
Both parents, Catherine and Jim, also were in attendance and it was an especially proud moment for the patriarch of the family.
“It was fun to see all three of our boys’ dreams come true,” Jim told USA Lacrosse following the game in 2017.
A couple of years after the scrimmage, Jim died following a battle with lymphoma.
“It’s crazy to think it’s been six years. It feels like it happened yesterday,” Jake said. “There’s probably not enough time on this call to speak on what he means to me, Jesse and Jared. He was everything to us. I miss him, I know those guys miss him too and it still hasn’t set in… I don’t know if it ever will.”
On the sixth anniversary of Jim’s death, the Bernhardts gathered in Baltimore for the Whipsnakes’ homecoming weekend, with Catherine in attendance.
“It was nice to be able to see her, and I’m sure it was good for her to be able to see all of us in one place,” Jake said.
“We wouldn’t be able to be where we are without her,” Jared added. “She’s one of the toughest people I know, never really complains and has helped us push forward. I love her and appreciate everything that she’s done for us.”
“She’s definitely been a rock. My dad used to get a lot of the love for his background in coaching football, but my mom was definitely the steady hand for everybody. Being a football coach’s wife is not easy,” Jesse said. “I’m sure it warms her heart a little bit knowing we can spend some time together.”
Together, the family continues to carry Jim’s legacy.
“His impact specific to the sports stuff is heavy on us and how we operate,” Jared explained. “But outside of sports, he taught us the importance of being a good person, consistency, discipline and taking care of your family and friends.”
Jesse appreciates the time he spent with his father while a member of the Bayhawks in particular.
“He was always busy doing his thing with football and at times living away from the family, whether it was at Penn State or in Houston,” Jesse said. “So, to go from not seeing him for an extended period to time to then seeing him on a week-to-week basis [with the Bayhawks] was special.”
“I credit him and my mom for harping on sticking to a process and being committed to something,” Jesse continued. “To be able to [play lacrosse professionally] for 13 years, I definitely fall back on a lot of those lessons that we were taught growing up. And now, as a dad myself, I get to share those things with my little guy.”
Just a few months after Jim’s passing, Jake won a PLL championship with the Whipsnakes and Jesse won an MLL championship with the Cottle-led Chesapeake Bayhawks. For Jesse in particular, winning another title with Cottle was a full-circle moment.
“I’ll forever be indebted to Coach Cottle,” Jesse said. “He was the one that gave Jake and me an opportunity to attend Maryland and that altered the direction of my life in more positive ways than I think anyone could imagine. I’ll forever be grateful to have continued that relationship with him in my pro career.”
The brothers were introduced to lacrosse when Jim took them to a lacrosse camp in the Orlando area run by Cottle, coach of Loyola University Maryland at the time.
“We wouldn’t be anywhere where we currently are without him,” Jake said. “He was instrumental in making us first fall in love with the game and want to pursue it at the next level.”
While Jake and Jesse, who are in their 13th professional season, are grateful for Cottle’s influence, their former college coach is equally grateful for his time coaching them and his friendship with their father.
“Jim was a coach’s coach. If you had a problem, he just had a way of giving you both sides of an equation without telling you which way to go,” Cottle explained.
Tillman echoed his Maryland predecessor’s comments about the Bernhardts.
“[Jim] was an amazing coach and an even greater person. There’s so much of Catherine and Jim in those boys,” Tillman said. “And a lot of the sayings that Jim used to say, Jesse will say with our guys. They idolized Jim and, in a lot of ways, so did I.”
Tillman credits Jim for helping him as a young coach when he took over the Maryland lacrosse program in 2010.
“I’m indebted to him just because of all those times he helped me as a young coach. I only had three years of head coaching experience,” Tillman explained. “There’s a lot of things that come up that aren’t in the coaching handbook and those are things that Jim really helped me with. He became almost like a second father to me.”
Tillman, who coached Jared for five seasons, has had all three brothers on his coaching staff at various points, with Jesse entering his ninth season as the Terps defensive coordinator next spring.
“From being sons of a coach, they’re just so good at understanding people,” Tillman said. “They know how to make in-game adjustments and how to prepare. They’re consistent and they’re steady.”
Tillman also has enjoyed watching Jared’s return to lacrosse and praised his versatility.
“I have so much respect for Jared and just know how talented he is,” Tillman said. “He can play with the ball, he can play without the ball. He can go left hand or right hand. He can play inside, he can play on the perimeter, he could play above the goal. He could be behind and play behind the goal. “
Tillman takes pride in Maryland’s ability to develop players with diverse skillsets.
“We want to create guys that are really flexible because in a league with just 19 guys on your active roster, it’s really hard to earn a spot,” Tillman explained.
“Jim Bernhardt used to say this all the time: there are ‘but’ guys and there are ‘and’ guys. The ‘but’ guys are those with some red flags or limitations, while the ‘and’ guys do a great job off the field and are good leaders. He’s a good scorer and he’s a good passer,” Tillman said. “We challenge our guys to always be adding more tools to their tool kit. There’s a certain level of unselfishness and toughness that I think those guys in the [PLL] certainly like.”
Jared’s decision to sign with the Outlaws in free agency was partially motivated by the chance to play with several of his former Maryland teammates.
“The comfort of the Oulaws was a factor [in my decision],” Jared explained. “The Maryland connections are super strong and I’m pretty close with all of those guys… It has definitely made the transition pretty smooth.”
Cottle further explained the unique bond among Maryland alumni.
“The thing I take the most pride in about Maryland players is that they come in together, they leave together and they stay together,” Cottle said. “You’re not a Terp for four years. You become a Terp for the rest of your life. I think that the [Bernhardt] boys epitomize that.”
Coach Soudan has been one of the beneficiaries of former Maryland players’ success at the next level.
“We made a promise to ourselves a few years back that we were going to draft and acquire guys from winning programs and pick the toughest guys we can possibly find… There happens to be a lot of Terps involved in that,” Soudan explained. “I think with Jared Bernhardt, you not only get the highest level of character, but one of the highest levels of athleticism in this league at this point.”
“I think he sees the field as well as anybody on our team,” Soudan continued. “And for a guy that’s talented as him, he’s humble and gracious. I think it’s such a good opportunity for [Jared and Jesse] to play together at the end of Jesse’s career.”
When asked about Jake having to potentially defend his younger brother on Saturday, Coach Stagnitta quipped: “It’s a possibility that we would like to stay out of.”
“If that’s going to be the matchup all day, I’m going to give the nod to little brother,” Stagnitta continued. “But if we can put Jake in positions where he excels, where he’s off-ball and playing against the bigger middies on that team, then we’ll be able to thrive defensively.”
While opposing coaches focus on stopping the youngest Bernhardt and the Outlaws, Jared remains focused on improving each week. He doesn’t take for granted the opportunity to have now played both professional lacrosse and professional football, and this latest chapter in his athletic career is a culmination of a dream he and his father once discussed.
“I don’t know if he would have believed that I went and did both,” Jared said candidly.
Yet, Jim’s pride for his sons would likely extend beyond all of their athletic accomplishments.
“He used to tell us that sports have a lot of lessons for life,” Jared said. “He’d probably say he was most proud of how [my brothers and I] carry ourselves as people on a daily basis.”
